For Halloween this year, Megan and I are going Trunk-or-Treating with our ward, then wrapping ourselves in tin foil to get free $6 burritos at Chipotle, then we're going back to the apartment to have a Simpsons "Tree House of Horrors" marathon! While searching for all of the Simpsons Halloween episodes, I remembered one my favorite episodes and watched it last night with Megan. It's in season 6, called "And Maggie Makes Three." The episode is a flashback episode with Homer telling the story of why there are no baby pictures of Maggie in the photo album. It goes back to Homer being able to quit his job at the power plant because he is out of debt, and being able to pursue his dream job of working at the bowling alley. But then the dream crashes down on him when he realizes that Marge is pregnant with their third child and Homer has to quit his dream job and humble himself to Mr. Burns and take back that his job at the plant. As a final spirit breaker, Mr. Burns mounts a plaque at Homer's desk that says "Don't Forget, You're Here Forever." Homer loses hope and is depressed, until he sees and holds Maggie for the first time in the hospital. Then finally comes the explanation of why there are no pictures of Maggie in the photo album:
We see that Homer has modified his plaque with pictures of his little girl to read, "Do it for her."
You know, The Simpsons have gotten a bad rap over the 20 years they've been on the air as "America's favorite dysfunctional family." But in reality, they are more functional than many families in the way that they have two loving parents (a man and a woman mind you), they are married and have been 100% faithful to each other, while Homer is made out to be idiotic most of the time, he authentically loves his wife and his children, while Marge obviously has many talents and could be successfull in the work force, she is a stay at home mom (there are a few episodes where she seeks employment, but those are in the minority). I guess what I'm getting at is there is something this episode paints that makes it one of my favorites.
School is hard, and I often don't like it. This stems from difficult lectures to sit through, painstaking exams to study for, massive homework sets to work at, and mondo projects that flatten my spirits. And while I do enjoy the difficult math and physics I'm studying in optics, I often find myself so swamped and dispirited that I just don't want to continue. Sometimes when I go see a musical performance or see a movie like "August Rush," I'm reminded at how talented I used to be at the Trombone and how trained my voice used to be. I've often told myself that if I were girl and didn't have to worry about being successful, I would have been a music major with focus in Trombone performance. I also sometimes think about how much I love live performance and how much I love performing on stage. Also, especially after watching shows like American Gladiators, I think about how fit I could be and how trained and strong I could make my body if I just had the time. But instead I spend my days waking up early to finish homework, go to school around 7 or 8 to go to classes, eat every meal on the run, spend all my in between time at my laptop doing more homework, and finally leaving the school sometimes as late as midnight (or later) because I was working on more homework. It's just not pleasant!
However, this Simpsons episode helps me put things in perspective. I don't do it because it's fun, though optics can be fun when it's not overwhelming, nor do I do it for self gratification, though successfully accomplishing projects and seeing how much I've learned is gratifying. I "do it for her."
And not just for Megan, I do it for all the babies we'll have and the great family we hope to raise. I haven't given up my dreams. I've just modified them to include more people. While my talents in music and in performance may be untapped, I'll be able to enjoy them all my life, just in different ways then I ever thought. This is my motivation to get me through this difficult and final year of school and on to the other side of next May.
